Distant View

Daily Cartoons

Recent Features

The Daily Laugh


Search the Site

Back Home

Bumper Stickers

The gene pool could use a little chlorine

I love cats...they taste just like chicken

Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot

Jack Kevorkian for White House Physician

I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather....Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car....

Your kid may be an honor student but you're still an IDIOT!

If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?

Forget about World Peace.....Visualize Using Your Turn Signal!

He who laughs last thinks slowest

Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes.

i souport publik edekasion

We are Microsoft. Resistance Is Futile. You Will Be Assimilated.

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

Auntie Em: Hate you, Hate Kansas, Taking the dog. -Dorothy

All generalizations are false.

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

Time is what keeps everything from happening at once.

Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

Seen on an old, beat-up car: This is not an abandoned vehicle

Born Free. . . . .Taxed to Death

Cover me. I'm changing lanes.

As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools

The more people I meet, the more I like my dog

Sometimes I wake up grumpy; Other times I let her sleep

All men are Idiots, and I married their King!

Work is for people who don't know how to fish

Montana --- At least our cows are sane!

I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian

Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition

It's as BAD as you think, and they ARE out to get you

If you don't like the news, go out and make some

I Brake For No Apparent Reason

When you do a good deed, get a receipt, in case heaven is like the IRS

Sorry, I don't date outside my species

I may be fat, but you're ugly - I can lose weight!

No Radio - Already Stolen

Real women don't have hot flashes, they have power surges

I took an IQ test and the results were negative

When there's a will, I want to be in it!

Okay, who stopped the payment on my reality check?

Few women admit their age, Few men act it!

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!

Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW!

Tell me to 'Stuff It' - I'm a taxidermist

IRS: We've got what it takes to take what you have got

Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all it's students!

It's lonely at the top, but you eat better

According to my calculations the problem doesn't exist

Pride is what we have. Vanity is what others have

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory

How Can I Miss You if You Won't Go Away?

Seen on a woman's car: Men call us birds, we pick up worms

Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear

Give me ambiguity or give me something else

We have enough youth, how about a fountain of SMART?

Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else

Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere may be happy

Consciousness: that annoying time between naps

Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home

Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word?

Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie!'... till you can find a rock

I like you, but I wouldn't want to see you working with sub-atomic particles

I is a college student

Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself

I'm out of bed and dressed, What more do you want?

If you don't like the news, go out and make some

Few women admit their age; Fewer men act it

Pride is what we have. Vanity is what others have

How can I miss you if you won't go away?

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder

Horn broken -- Watch for finger

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math

Pray for me. I drive I-95 Daily !

Back Home